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tHinkinG deEp

I am not on the mood. . . This cold is irritating me a lot at marami pa akong kailangan gawin. S***! Takte pressure, pressure! Ahhh grabe!

REFLECTION:

Lately I've been thinking, why do I need to endure this s*** if there is an easy way. I have two doors in front of me right now. The first one is I may continue and pursue on my goal and the second one is just to give it up for a while and be on my league.

The first one is really difficult to achieve but its a short cut to get what I need, the catch is, lately its not going on my turns. No matter how hard I try, nothing seems happening. What's even worse I am falling even more and more to the cliff I am hanging on.

The second is quite easy, this is something what I really am. I would be doing something that I could live and die for instead. But going through this door is like throwing my ticket to the bin. My goal will be somewhat out of the way. I would really like to talk about this with my parents, but we would again argue about it, mostly it would be about money. Now I am also thinking of just going on but like I said the situation is getting worse.

This so frustrating, I should have shifted last year. And doing this now would mean another adjustment plus I may have to review all over again. Gah! Decisions, decisions! This is so f****** me up! Sometimes I am getting unstable just because of this! You, what would you do if you are in this predicament!?

rEvIeW then rEst

It was a good day today, wooohhhooooo! Although I didn't performed well sa practical at wala kaming halos nagawa kung di matulog halos 3/4 of the time sa RLE, I ended up the day with a blast. Akala ko sa Friday lang walang pasok sa Sabado rin pala! Laking tuwa ko. Timezone agad ako at nag laro ng Maximum Tune 3 hehehe. Improving ka na hehehe! Manual ka lang kaya mo yan. Ei sorry hindi ko nadala yung USB, nahihiya ako sayo sa totoo lang, wala kang pasok nagyon tapos pero you went there just to borrow my USB, sorry talaga sorry. . .

REFLECTION:

Whatever issues that is going to happen to you both parties, count me out! There is no freaking way I will interfere your mess. Remember that I am neutral and quite flexible. This is why I don't minggle with you that much anymore. All (well. . . some) of you are some what trouble makers. Please I had enough hell just entering the building every week and I don't want anymore problems to add up further to my load. This is just a friendly reminder, don't think of anything else!

Despite of the things that happened, this day was heaven sent! It has been so often that I hear good news! Thanks be to God! For the first time ever I thank you GMA and MDC! I really need some rest!

tO tRuSt

Meron nang Maximum Tune 3 hehehe, hmmm will I continue my acct or just use my other no so used account. Medyo kailangan ko mag budget for this becuase it P27/game. Hindi ako naka review sa Unit Test for Microbio Lec at buti na lang wala yung prof namin dun. Laking tuwa namin, but heck tomorrow mukhang hassle pa rin. I've got two assignments sa PolGov, review for Health Care and Stat. Mag pupuyat nanaman ako. I've heard mag ililipat daw yung mga makukulit sa iba't ibang section; wether I'll transfer or not I just hope kahit man lang isa or tatlo o apat sa section namin kasama ko pa rin or better yet mag irregular na lang ako.

REFLECTION:

Why is it so hard to gain trust esspecially to your own instincts, sometimes it helps you sometimes it betrays you. Believe it or not my instinct is stronger than me and mostly it prevails all of my doubts. Call me crazy but this is what's been happening to me lately. Is it just me or is it just a coinsidence? But I think if you are in my position, you too will also be confused.

wRittiNg tHis leTTer

It was Nutrition day sa school, swerte ng mga nag nutrition classes, wala sila gagawin kungdi magluto the whole day. But the day went well, buti na lang hindi natuloy yung quiz namin sa Microbio, absent pa naman ako nun, pero guess what may long test naman kami tomorrow. Astig pala itsura ng fungi sa microscope hehehe la lang. I have to find a way to buy that Maglaya book.


Ei musta ka na? Hindi na tayo masyado nag-uusap. I hope your doing fine, sobrang namimiss na kita! Good luck on your studies.


We had a deep and personal meeting last night, I've got nothing more to add to that.


REFLECTION:


First of all I apologize if ever I was annoying to you last night. I was not thinking, I am really sorry.


Now you've anonymously heard my struggles, I thank you for showing your concerns. I know that you would listen but I never thought that you would give me advices, actually two advices. I am really thankful that I am in this organization, all of you guys are really God's blessings.


To those who had problems with regards to there families and studies, just pray hard and try to listen to what He has to say. Remember everything is just temporary, even problems, it will soon come to pass. Just hold on and all of us have the same load.


On behalf of my fellow youth, we will do our best to do things to be good followers and be the LIGHT.

fIrSt tAste oF tHiNgS tO cOmE

Buti naman hindi ako na late dito sa subject na ito. May mga gamit ako nakalimutan pero hindi masyado pa kailangan yun. Umulan ng violation slips kanina sa RLE. The CIs are very freakin' strict, takte. Kamuntik na nga ako mabigyan eh, just because of my bigote. Yun pa nung lunch, we are only allowed to take it for 30 minutes. Eh ang dami-dami naming nag RLE, so puno yung canteen. Ayaw man lang mag pasuyo (dun sa mga nakapila kung kayo kaya nasa sitwasyon ko anong gagawin nyo!? It's easy to say na pipila kayo! Tignan lang natin ha, napamura kita tuloy ng di oras). So I have to go to Bluewave KFC pa, (dun sa mga nakasakay sa jeep na di ko kilala, I am terribly sorry kung nasasagi o nasisiko ko kayo ah hindi ko sinasadya yun, wala lang talaga ako sa mood) nag take out ako ng lunch, tapos pumunta ako sa treats to buy a shave (takte P34.00 ano yun ginto yung blade?). Tapos while eating my lunch nag lakad ako pabalik ng school. Exactly tapos na ako mag lunch pagdating sa gate. Punta agad ako sa Fundamentals room, buti wala pa yung mga CIs; so I had spare time to go to the washroom and shave. But make no mistake, masaya matuto sa RLE ang ayaw ko lang yung pagkahigpit nila.

REFLECTION:

I had the first taste of being desperate today. Desperate to eat, to go home, to excell and to have peace of mind. I just wonder if this is just the beggining, what more in the near future. I realy need to change. I really need to learn how to be independent, somehow to survive with my own effort. I really need to focus. What I fear is that one day I might go crazy learning too much, breaking down, gone mad or might collapse in school, home, or on the road because of too much pressure and stress. I hope that these things doesn't happen. . .

sUrPriSe 4th Parable. . .

Wow, si daddy nasa mood! hahahaha! We went to MOA and ate in Tokyo Tokyo, bumili siya ng sphygmomanometer for me dun din sa mall, tapos pinalaro niya ako ng Maximum Tune 2 sa Timezone he added a few pesos, hehehehe.

Ei I am really sory talaga about yung pagbunot ko sa piano. Glad to see you back, don't worry your feet will heal soon. Pasanayin mo muna and just to what the doctor's told you to do. Pare pareho lang tayo naantok at nababangag okay, =)) at nung Saturday 3 oras lang ako nakatulog. I hope you are fully decided with your course, good luck din sa mga nag kukuha ng entrance exam sa iba't ibang schools. Kaya nyo yan!

REFLECTION:

A husband of two children woke up happily, becuase it is currently his birthday. He tried to wake up his wife, sleeping beside him. But it seems that she was not waking up at all. He gets up on bed and headed for his children. He opened the door of there bedroom and told them to wake up. But they too are still in big slumber. So the father just ate his breakfast alone, took a bath, dressed up and headed for work. He did not know that his family were planning a big suprise for him.

After he left the house, his daughter and son got up and ordered a cake, bought some beverages and wrapped the presents that they bought a week ago. His wife got up and quickly went to the kitchen and cooked all the delcious recepies that she could think of. They estimated that by 5pm all of there preparations will be finished. It was also the same time that the familly man will be home from work.

But to there surprise, he went back home earlier about 1pm. When he is already inside the house, he noticed that his family were not surprise at all that he got back early and that they were all hands full. He went to the dinning table and asked her daughter to give him a glass of water to drink. But his daughter told him that she was too busy. So instead, he got up the table and gave him self a glass of water to drink. He then went to the living room and took off his shoes. He asked his son to get his slippers; but his son said that he was too busy. Hearing that reply he puts back his shoes on again and went to the kitchen instead. He approaches his wife, kissed her and said: "I miss you. . ." But his wife was too busy cooking and told him to rest inside the bedroom. After that reply he left the kitchen and went inside the bedroom.

When all the preparations were done (food, beverages, plates, glasses, fork and sppon were all in the table). The son grabbed his guitar, the daughter grabbed the three birthday presents, the wife lighted the candle on top of the cake and the three of them went to the bedroom. All together they opened the door singing a Happy Birthday song to the family man sleeping on the bed. When they were done singing they noticed that he was not moving at all. The son dropped his guitar and went near his father and found out that he was not breathing. The daughter then dropped the present and saw a note on the clipboard that was hanging on the closet. It says: "I love you all, there were two reasons why I am here early. First is because of my birthday and second it is also my time. I will all miss you." The mother placed the cake on his husband's work table just near the bed and went near him. With tears falling fom both her eyes she gave him a kiss on the chick and said, "Surprise. . . Happy Birthday, I love you. . ."

Rip off and edited from today's homily by Fr. Jhude

iTs nOt rIgHt aNyMoRe

Mukhang napapadalas na ang pagkapasaway natin ah. . . Medyo bawas bawasan natin pare at baka mapahamak pa tayo lalo. Hmm mukhang nahihirapan na ako sa Maximum Tune ah hehehe. Tuloy pa ba yung plano natin sa Thursday? Sorry ah hindi tayo nakapag counter at madami tayong ginagawa, dbali promise ko talaga babawi ako sayo. We stand alone together na ito man, tulung-tulongan tayo, sama-sama ah walang iwanan! We will soon have our RLE, s***, simula na ang pagdudusa natin dito for sure. I need to buy that jogging pants ASAP!

I wonder how are you getting along with your section? Ayos yung tanong na napapunta sa akin noh!? Hehehehe kasi ba naman sa lahat ba naman ng questions na mapapapunta yan pa!

Well, I greet Happy Birthday (belated rather) again to those people who had there birthday From July 14-15.

REFLECTION:

How awkward it is that you were able to pick it; it actually fits to your current situation. I just really wonder, you already know that there is something wrong and yet I don't see any effort of changing. Well if you don't want to, don't be angry with us okay! We offered you help, it is you who don't want help from us.

This isn't right anymore guys! It's too much and we are abusing our own freedom. We already paid the price many times and still we have the guts to repeat our errors. At this point we should already know how to use our sense of responsibility. I know sometimes I am being tempted to the same. But the difference is I have my conscience with me and I really think about my actions before executing them. How about you? Are you not afraid of getting expelled? We'll see about that, won't we?

I hope with our plan we will be able to focus more on the right path. Let's make a difference, shall we?

hAssLe

Grabe saksakan ng review itong week na ito, wala pa ako napapasa na quiz sa Microbio tapos mababagsak ko pa ata yung unit test nun. Buti sa laboratory nakakabawi ako hehehe, mas gusto ko kasi hands on eh. Yung Funda parang mahirap siyang tignan pero its quite simple pala, naaply mo naman kasi in real life. Nakakaadik mag Maximum Tune 2 my goodness, may card na ako pero I am just a newbe, nasa Licence A palang ako, Racer under practice and sa mga stars destoryer palang ako. Dibali gagaling din ako in time. You guys better try it manually hindi automatic. Bad trip nawawala jogging pants ko errr, so I have to buy a new one. Buti pala bumalik ako sa Micro lab nung Saturday, buti di pa siya nag checheck ng attendance at buti di niya ako nakita pumasok ng room, isang oras akong late, =)). Sorry guys if napahamak ko kayo because that ah hehehe. . .

Nakakamiss ka din, hehehe, hindi kita nakaka-usap for almost a month na ah; irreg ka na kasi eh. Cge susubukan ko mag save tapos laro tayo counter hehehe!

REFLECTION:

As I walk further to the road I am in, the challenges are getting tougher than ever. I just notice everytime I try something the second time, I mostly fall; I am struggling. My own goal is the only thing that keeps me from standing up. I asure you, that no matter how hard I fall, I will pull myself up. No matter how hard the wind blows from every direction, I will still focus on the path I am walking. I won't fail you guys I promise.

"A child plays at your feet, growing and learning. That little one has incredible potential, a hidden reservoir of capability and creativity, but in order for those possibilities to be developed, parents must take time . . . listen, train, encourage, reprove, challenge, support, and model. Moms and dads do not have to do any of that. The child neither requires nor demands that we do so. If, however, we hope to raise secure and healthy offspring, those things are required. You do not have to pay the price to grow and expand intellectually. The mind neither requires it nor demands it. If, however, you want to experience the joy of discovery and the pleasure of plowing new and fertile soil, effort is required.

'You do not have to sit outside in the dark. If, however, you want to look at the stars, you will find that darkness is required. The stars neither require it nor demand it' (Annie Dillard).If the splendor of the stars is worth sitting outside in the dark, believe me, the joy of fresh discovery is worth sitting inside in the light."

Rip off from SITTING IN THE LIGHTby Charles R. Swindoll

uNeXpeCttEd

As usual nag cutting ulit hehehe. . . But I had a complete day today though hehehe. . .

Sory, takutin nyo pa man din ako hindi uubra sa akin yan. Nakaka adik yung racing ah you should try manual rather automatic, its really challenging but cool. At least you can control your speed. Guys wag na tayo masyado mag cutting at mukhang nasosobrahan na ata, heheehehe!

REFLECTION:

Ei I hope you like the gift I gave you. It's for real. Don't think of something else I just want to share what I have with you.

Thanks for believing and trusting on me. Even, I, myself can't believe too to what had happen. The meeting went well. But still I am surprised to myself. Honestly to, tell you the truth, I didn't prepare that much. I am not lazy though, it's just when I am reporting or talking in front I would prefer the words to come out naturally than prepared. If ever prepared I'll just put bullet points at an index card and will just elaborate further. But tonight it was not me talking, but Him. And what an honor to use me as his instrument.

whAt's nExt?

Grabe naman! First yung obviously scripted death ni Vince McMahon tapos ngayon naman yung real death ni Chris Benoit. He was not alone though he was with his family. Well to the Rabid Wolverine, I salute you. Thanks for the entertainment. . . Have fun there with Edie Guerrero!

Nice chillax by the way last Saturday! Hehehehe pare easy next time sa pag-inom! Welcome back sa nakabalik hehehe! Kaya natin toh! Sorry though I felt like I had not contributed anything. . . I'll work out the activity.

Buti na lang may nakakita ng Microbio book ko, I almost spend another P700. Pakapal na ng pakapal ang mga libro na binabasa ko. Tapos tinatamad pa ako lately :(( I should change my habbits na at lately kung di sabaw, sabog naman ako.

REFLECTION:

I never thought that I will be seeing you again. So now that your here, to tell you honestly I don't know what to do next. There is this something that keeps me close to you and there is this something that keeps us apart. I understand that you need to focus on your studies. But, you, being so close to me confuses me a lot. Then your going to open up that your going to set aside relationships for your studies. But what really makes me wonder is that your telling me that you are confused also of something that you don't want to talk about (but you just brought it up), what's that suppose to mean? But if I am right, we both have something in common. I don't wanna risk something with you, not now.

I am deeply sorry my dear brother and sister. . . But a lot of changes happened to you both. . . What happened to the commitment? What happened to the sharing and openness? What happened to my brother and sister that I really know for so long? Sorry if I am such a meddling kid but both of you now, are having a world of your own. With in this world you limit yourselves together in such a way that you are now forgetting others. You are always inside a sound proofed room. I am saying this not as a big meddling kid but as a concerned little brother.

cLoSiNg SuMMeR

Well mag sesecond year na ako hahaha, ok lang kahit hindi natuloy yung mga plano ko this break as long as naka enjoy ako hehehe.

Ano ba yan wala pa tayo sked hehehe! Pero meron na tayo officers, haha.

REFLECTION:

I could now see the stakes are getting higher and higher but whatever it is, I am ready for it now. But this doesn't mean that I will get the hold of this for a day. This may take me weeks or even months. But I am up to the challenge. This has now become the survival fittest.

Yes we are now close, even though we had been knowing each other for only a couple of months. So honestly I'll miss you a lot. I know that you can make it. Take care of yourself and keep in touch.

F*** I really hate good byes!

dIssApOiNtEd

Well naka enroll na ako, mag kaseksyon nanaman kami ng section ko last year but some are wala na. Buti na lang hindi ako nagka waiver hehehe ang dami meron sa amin eh.

Sayang! Kung alam ko lang na sabay kayo mag enroll, sasama talaga ako sa inyo. Or kung sana man lang binigay na lang sa amin yung clearance forms then makakasama ko kayo. I really wanted to change my section to meet new people. But I guess hindi talaga pwede.

Just watched Ocean's 13 nga pala, hehehe. . .

REFLECTION:

Have you ever felt like you're all alone in a group? I always carry this feeling of solidarity. Every where I go it seems like I am not fitted to the picture. Am I really a loser or just over reacting? I can't believe that all of my hard work will just end up in a bin. Was it worth it? If it was why is this happening to me? Did I just got lucky? Or was it just because of my absence? I felt ashamed to tell you honestly. I will not be surprised if you guys discriminate me or whatsoever. I remember the time that I gave up everything to move on-- I guess I really did give up everything. So now I really have to give this up, right? Give up all our old times. Or am I just taking this seriously? Probably this is what I get for being so selfish; maybe I deserve this? Over and over again, sacrificing the things that you had is really a pain in the ass. You may either gain or loose. I felt like I am a computer that's not been updated for a long time.

Chapter 2

The sun has fully shown its light to the world. The cool air entering the window and its curtains follow the rhythm. Carrying a smooth and gentle breeze to a tight spaced room. The sun's light gently touches her face waking her up with a bright and beautiful morning. Her eyes opened slowly and locked its gaze to the clock; the time was 6:30 am. She slowly got up from bed, tenderly holding her big stomach and approached the crib near the door. He is still in deep slumber.

"I hope she'll like this for it will be my last for now." Perry said to himself as he turns over the fish from the pan carefully.

"When will you be coming back, daddy?" Monique asked seated at the dinning table eating breakfast.

"I don't know, honey." He answered, he approaches his daughter, knelt to her and said

"But, I, promise you this," he grabbed her hand holding it with affliction “When your daddy comes back I’ll give you a surprise.”

“May I know the surprise?”

“It won’t be a surprise if I tell you.” She then carried her from the chair kissing her from the chick

“Oh dear your getting heavy.”

“I know.” She chuckled

“How old are you, sweet heart?”

“Eight years old!”

“You’ve grown so much now, you love the breakfast that I’ve made for you?” he asks giggling her daughter’s nose

“Yeah, it makes me grow strong!”

“Yeah, and your about to drain mine by burning it.” Elaine said coming in the kitchen turning the gas stove off. Perry then carefully drops his daughter and said,

“Okay, darling, go ahead fix yourself and give a final look at your things.” Her daughter quickly ran upstairs, back to her bedroom. When their daughter was out of sight they gave each other a kiss and sat down at the table.

“What’s so funny?” He said noticed that Elaine was laughing

“Did you just make this?” She asks looking at the salad on the table in front of her

“Yes, why does it taste bad?”
Elaine grabbed a spoon, scooped a little and put it inside her mouth.

“Hmm, tastes good!” She said, impressed by his creation
They could hear the foot stomps from daughter heading downstairs towards them. When she got into the kitchen she gave her daddy and mommy a good-bye kiss. She quickly ran outside the house and headed for school.

“Very brave and charming, isn’t she?” Elaine said

“She’s so young but she faces the world as if she knows it all.” He replied standing up the table getting his plate to the sink. “She knows the dangers that could lurk in every corner but it seems like it didn’t matter to her.”

“She got it from you, dear. You made her strong.” She said standing up and hugging her husband from behind.

“Both of us are facing scarcity but yet, you made things possible for her, for us.”

“Its time for me to go.” Perry said turning to kiss her

“Take care of yourself.” She said,

Perry kneels down and kisses her stomach,
“I’ll be seeing you soon my little angel.”

He then went to the living room to get his travel bag. As he heads for the main door and opens it, he gave his final world.

“I’ll be back soon.” And he closes the door behind him

“Take care!” she said as tears ran down from her eyes.

rEaChiNg oUt

Ano ba yan! Hindi matutloy yung panonood ng Pirates 3! Oh well, napanood ko na siya actually nung Sunday with dadehyoh. Kaya nga lang hindi ko masyado naintindihan yung movie, is it because the way they project the script or I need to watch part 2 again? Well basta for me ang lalim ng movie.

Naks at least may work na hehehehe send my regrads to your husband. See you all guys soon.

REFLECTION:

I had finally open up myself to you. I should have done this sharing a long time ago. But this doesn't mean that everything's too late. Rather, this is a good head start for my upcoming obstacles. The story that you told me, truly, was inspiring. Thanks for the time, understanding and advices. I am hoping that one day, we would all be together in a gathering. I really miss you guys a lot.

Chapter 1

"Are you ready, now?" Kervin has always been asking this question to Dray every time he wakes up. But Dray would always reply,

"Not in the mood man, maybe next time." As he heavily carry his body to the washroom to do his morning routines

"When will you ever grow up?" He said in disgust.

Dray had nothing left but his cousin Kervin, his parents and sister had left him behind. They were fed up of the boy's idle life. But Kervin, being in the family that's rich and strong has always been supporting his cousin ever since childhood. They treat each other as if they were brothers. Dray had never been like this, so down, pale, depressed and pathetic. His cousin could not believe on what seemed to be a brave, dilligent, talented and young faithfull competitor, has now become a coward, lazy and weak being that he had ever seen.

"What made him like this?"

Kervin would ask himself as he watch his cousin washing his face and brushing his teeth. He would then go back to his room scattered with his school books, papers and clothes. His room was filled with clothes that he can't distinguish the old ones from the new. His cousin had already gave up fixing his room,

"I had never seen him this disorganized."

He said to himself everytime he sees Dray's dirty room.

"But thank God at least he eats at the dinnning room."

"I am going out now." Dray said, he had not taken his bath nor combed his hair.

"Won't you eat for a while?" Kervin asks

"Not hungry." Walking towards the door twisting its door knob

"You sure you had everything with you?"

Dray didn't reply and closed the main door of the house behind him.

"May God have mercy on you."

Dray would always head first to Cafe Macho, three blocks from his house. He does not go inside and eat, instead he goes behind it towards the big lake to watch the sunrise. He always observes the people around him as the sun rises from the horizon. He mostly envies the children playing at the play ground near by the lake. He would always say for himslef:

"So young and innocent for now, but soon their laughter would turn into tears and from fun to sorrow as they would soon journey to the world of so called reality."

As the sun has fully shown itself, he would welcome the day with either hatred or regret. Wishing that he had not woke up that morning. Questioning himself and to God,

"What have I done wrong that I deserve this kind of life?"

He wanted to cry but not a single tear drop from his eyes. So much anger, so much pain, staring at the sunrise with grief as if he carries the world around his shoulders. Wanted nothing more but peace of mind that seem so far away.

gIvE iT aLL

Guys ang saya talaga, no words can describe what I felt that night. Hahahaha tricycle driver uyyyy mas malala pala ito =))!!! Mr. Free here is your coffee bwahahahahaha!!! Buti na lang I have savings for you hehehehe kung wala ewan ko na lang hehehehe. Its okay lang for me to spend for you its worth it naman eh, heheheh!

REFLECTION:
Tonight night was different from all other nights. It was an extra ordinary experience in my part and it was a privilege to be there offering my musical talent for Him.

We will have our time don't worry, neither of us are in a hurry right? I could wait, time will come that we will lead for them.

Thanks to your advice, I think I have found the courge to move on even further. But there will always be a mark left on me. Even if I don't like my group, I think I have found my attachment to them. It is so difficult to let go. There will always be a sacrifice to everything that I do and I find this frustrating. But like you said I don't need them.

Love lots, I miss you, see you soon. . . I think that day will be my last with you. . . You know, your right, I should have been there. I can't believe that I had been so selfish and numb. I think this was my biggest regret. I didn't take the chance to say sorry. The chance of asking why did this happen between us. The chance of reaching out to others who I think were also trying to reach out to me. Now I have to face these regrets thats haunting me. But like I said, I am ready for round two. I will use this to redeem myself; that is if there will be a round two.

gLAd tO sEe yA aLL!

Yo guys, am I glad to see you all! Although di tayo kumpleto k lang meron pa naman tayong plano. I still have my style on playing the guitar. Naks marunong ka na mag drums, konting practice pa! Rusted na ako sa Dota pero at least panalo nung first match. Pano ba yan reunion natin natapos natin yung 10 Hero Seige, ahahahahahahaha ayos tatlo palang tayo nun ah wala pa yung iba! Hehehehe if you got any plans just text or call ah! Oh by the way, astig yung Heroes man!

Nag serve ako nung Tuesday hehehe! Yung isa d pumunta hehehehe!

REFLECTION:

It's been a while that I've got contact with all of you guys. I've got so much to tell you but I guess our fun and hobbies went first.

You can't just show up like that! Having a good company and background doesn't mean you could just crash in. Remember you had done a violation which leaded you out of the group.

a fRieNd's mEssAge

Friends smile at you

They like your face

They want to be with you

Any old place

Friends have fun with you

Friends share

They're glad when you're happy

When you're sad, they care

If you're a friend

Then you care, too

That's why your friends

Are glad you're you

-Cherry

I'LL be sEeiNg yOu gUys! again. . .

The prayer meeting went well, pang retreat yun ah! hehehe. . . Naalala ko tuloy yung retreat namin nung high school. Memories! Partner! pumunta ka naman sana sa seminar! hehehe. . . Ei wag kau sana mang trip ah yung pic namin ni "Joeseph" wag nang ibroadcast sa iba. =(( :D =))


Thanks for showing that you care ah! Grabe I think I am not worth it! Hahahahah =)) pero thanks talaga, pero I think magkikita pa tayo eh ;-) kaya see ya soon.


Grabe hindi ito pwede! Hindi ko ata mapapanood yung Pirates, ampf!


REFLECTION:
When will you ever learn? When will you open your eyes and realize that something is not right? When will you think of others besides yourself? You wanna be unique? All of us are, sir! You better do "your thing" on the right place at the right time.


I am ready to take round two! If that is what You wish I will be willing to do it again. Just bring it on!

AdiOs for noW

Well lahat na lang palpak! Hindi tuloy yung plano ko and she is not replying at all. Well I understand, she might be busy and nakakahiya na papalit na lang ng papalit ng sked :-S. . . Well hindi ko alam na ayos na pala yung lists of sections. Sorry if I am such a KJ (like what others would comment mostly), pero I really want to rest na guys, pagod na ako. Dapat nagbabakasyon tayo but still we sacrificed it, pumapasok tayo at nag-aral. Kaya I need time naman for myself.

So guys ano na ang plano hehehe just call or text ah! ! !

REFLECTION:

Another level up for me I guess. . . And its time to leave my excess luggage an bring with me the important ones. Still I can't believe what happened to me this year. I had a sudden shock of what's on the boarder called reality. At first it was nice, you will be deceived by its beauty. But if you look deeper in to it you would see that everything is just mirage. And if you won't find a way to be strong it will take over your whole self.

But if it wasn't for you guys, I would let reality take over me. Thanks for the time and acceptance. Thanks too for lending me your ears.

But now I am prepared to face the so called reality. But this does not mean that I now know everything, for we never stop learning.

cLaSS "3rd pArAbLe"

Woooohhooooooo!!! Hindi na pala Saturday yung finals namin sa Friday na! My goodness! Mukhang matutuloy ng maaga yung plano ko hehehehe! But. . . sorry I am not interested on the party. What the heck , may possibility daw na magka section pa tayo. . . hehehehe so what's the use? Sana meron isa dyan man lang din na sumama sa plano ko!

Ui!!! Magkita sana tayo mag jamming tayo! Miss ko nang tumugtog with you guys!

Pano ba yan sa Saturday!? HAHAHAHA meron bang planong manood o "chillax"! hahahaha Looking forward for the prayer meeting though and yung outing ah sana matuloy na, hehehe...

Wooohhhhhooooo unting unti na umuulan!!!

REFLECTION:

There were three students, first was Juan who is always lazy. He keeps on dreaming and hoping for some luck to come in and pull up his grades. But it seems that he's laziness always came first. Second was Anton, he is not lazy nor intelligent, but one thing he's friends like about him is that he is wise, a smart aleck. And the last was Tina, she was intelligent and she was never out from the top ten of the class, though that intelligent she was humble about her intellect and she was a shy type.

One day the teacher told them to pass a reaction paper on the film that they watched in school. The teacher emphasized that this would help pull up there grades even those who are at high risk. As the three students went home they quickly turned on there computers to do the reaction paper. Juan was not able to watch the whole movie because he slept and skip almost all the important parts, so with all his effort he tried calling his friends and asked for some help. He asked if he could borrow a CD of the moive and watch it all over again. To his luck he was able to obtain one. Anton was able to watch the movie but has forgot some of the parts so he too called some of his friends and asked for help. Tina was able to watch the whole movie and typed her reactions for herself.

The next day the class including the three students passed the papers. The teacher immediately checked the papers and quickly gave it back to the students. To the students surprise it had no grade, the teacher then said.

"Write the desire grade that you want. Remember this will help you a lot but write the grades that would think is best and deserving for you. The movie is long and you skipped some of your subjects for the sake of watching this movie. You have ten seconds to think about it. Remember write the grades that you think you deserve!"

Juan wrote immediately 100%, Anton hesitated and asks himself,

"Is this another of my teacher's tricks?" So he wrote 86%.

Tina hesitated also and said "If I put 100% my classmates and teacher might think of something against of me." So she wrote 89%.

When the papers are again passed. The teachers asked them one by one,

"Why do you think you derve this?"

Both Anton and Tina had the same replies that they are not worthy to put a grade but him alone. Both of them thought that the teacher might think also that they might be abusing the free will given to them. But Juan stood up and said:

"Sir I need that grade, I know that I slept yesterday but I asked help from my friends and even burrowed a CD to watch it again at home sacrificing my time to sleep." When everybody gave out their own reasons the teacher then said.

"Whatever you wrote will be your grade!"

They were all shocked, they begged there papers back but the teacher won't let them.

Anton then asked Juan, "You know this one is coming, don't you?"

Juan replied, "Actually I don't, I think I deserve it. Though I did not watch it and slept instead, I punished myself last night by watching it again."

Tina then interffered and said, "But what made you do it, desperation for your grade?"

"No!" Juan said, "That night something changed with in me, I dreamed big!"

cOnfUsiOn

This week will finally be my last and soon I'll be on my second year, may God help me there hehehe. Well I think the jamming will be canceled but its okay as soon as my other plans eh matutuloy. Yung outing guys, sorry, but I decided not to go because (1) hindi tayo kumpleto, (2) I need time for myself naman, (3) I wanted to spend time with my cousins, HS friends and my current organization on the limited time given (4) Sabi ng dad ko na isa lang yung puntahan kung outing sa break ko kasi he needed my help sa house (5) I need to practice sa pag gigitara

Partner sorry I wasn't able to come nung Monday, bawi na lang ako next time. Sigurado na ba yang outing sa June? Sana matuloy!

REFLECTION:

I don't know why? But I felt different today maybe its just because that I am confused. There are so many things to choose on, but what is frustrating about it is I have to sacrifice something or someone. There will always be something on the line. And there would always be an element interfering my motives; reminding me of my limitations, possibilities and consequences.

There is this saying that we should first be a friend to everyone first, before you have friends. I am not saying that you are not friendly. Sometimes we must ask questions to ourselves if we lack on something or if we have done things that are not in favor to others. I am not feeling sorry for you nor am I a hypocrite, I am just trying to help. Only you could answer those questions, I am just a guide.

heLL

Well my friends, classmates and I went to Paco Park (again), Fort Santiago and Lights and Sounds for our subject Rizal. Okay na sana kaya lang pahamak yung init. Grabe halos mag-aamoy anak araw na kami. But we were able to take down informations naman.

Konti lang umatend sa Youth Ministry, not to mention late ako dumating hehehe.

REFLECTION:

My rest day is ruined! It is better to walk and trace our past than spend time to those things that is not worthy, even a drop of sweat. You are making things worse! Rather than learning something you are just confusing us all! I can't believe that they have spent cash on this trash.

tHe wAy

Nothing much happened this day, pero grabe ang init! ! ! Naghahanap pa ako ng makakasama sa pupuntahan ko sa May 26, ayoko mag isa. Matuloy man ang jamming o hindi okay lang sa akin basta yung talagang pupuntahan ko sana matuloy. Promise guys, medyo tinatamad ako sa outing natin hindi tayo kumpleto eh pasensya na hehehe pero kung yung isa dyan sa hindi makakasama ay pinayagan bigla. . . . . ay . . . . . why not? Dadala pa ako ng food and "drinks" para sa atin hehehe!

Tom morning pupunta ulit ako Paco Park this time iba naman kasama ko. Para ma check ko din yung mga na miss kong information. Sa Sunday na lang yung Lights and Sounds at Fort Santiago. Pero hmmmm. . . . Not unless may plan silang pumunta ng maaga why not ehehehe.


REFLECTION:
Well, now you know the reason. . . Now you know everything that had happened between us, I hope and even pray that you would tell her my side. You said, that she wanted to talk to me but was like wise afraid of what I might say to her. Actually, yes, normally everybody reacts am I right? You can't avoid it, in fact my friends and I have loads to tell her. . . But how could I talk to her if she wouldn't listen? Mind you, that it is because of her that I almost flunk at my studies. Yes I admit I got emotionally affected to the point that I am getting pathetic. But for me it is better to tell the truth than be afraid that you might hurt someone for telling it. Yet I could say that she is not concern. If she was, she won't think twice of telling it in front of my face. All that I need to do is be ready for the criticisms that she would throw on me. So please don't bother telling her my side, I have no problem about it.

"When you go, won't you even have the guts to say I don't love you like I loved you yesterday!"

sUddEn cHaNgE

Wow grabe ang saya ko ngayon hehehehe ! ! ! Yun nga lang muntikan na ako mapagalitan ni mam, and dal dal ko kasi sa katabi ko eh, hehehe. I hope matuloy yung mga plans ko sa May 26 and may I have a successful jamming too. . . Sana matuloy ako sa outing namin ng mga friends ko sa school (but medyo tinatamad na din ako kasi hindi kumpleto eh =(( )

Grabe ka!!! Nagkagusto ka sa teacher mo sa biology nung 2nd yr HS :-O, lahat na lang ng sa tingin mong pogi papatulan mo eh! Hahaha kasama ba din ako sa pogi? B-) (kapal noh!?)

We went to Paco Park, the place is very small, but at least I've seen the place were Rizal's body was found along with fathers Gom-Bur-Za. Fort Santiago na lang and Lights and Sounds hehehe at matatapos na tayo! ! !

One more week break na namin wooooohhhhoooooooo! ! ! Wala ba dyan CHILLAX!? hehehe. . . Oi! See you soon sa MDC =P

REFLECTION:

I have no idea if you really liked my report or you just felt sorry for me. But the thing is I believe that I deserve it (hindi naman sa pag yayabang). Like wise I also need it; at least pulling me up a little. If you only knew how much I worked hard for it. Oh yeah one more thing, about the thing I said before, I guess I am taking it back but still I have to say something on your attitudes.

tOo bAd . . .

Went to school as usual, pero sayang mukhang hindi ako matutuloy sa outing ng classmate ko, tsk tsk tsk, sayang. Dalawang outings na ang palpak, first is yung sa ministry (well at least postponed hehehe) and second, yung ito nga, sa classmate ko. Oh well talagang ganyan, babawi na lang ako sa kanila in another way, hehehe.

I can't wait to meet you and I've got loads to tell you!

REFLECTION:

Why are you disturbing her? She is now on peace! Stop bothering her! Can't you grow up and move on! She had been listening to you and what do you do? You ignore her! What is it that you want her to understand? You know very well that she is not problem but you are. If you got problems solve them on your own! I had my own problems, yes I do ask advices but still it is me who finds the solution to it. Why can't you do the same? You along with your company are making issues of your own. While we do the things that we have to do.

Nasa huli ang pagsisisi ! ! ! Hahahahaha :)) maiba naman

pErSoNaL

Ei hehehe wala pasok bukas! Please to all who are voters, VOTE WISELEY! ! ! Iboto nyo yung sa tingin nyo iaangat ang bansa natin sa poverty! (Naka naman hahahaha :)) )

REFLECTION:

We have not been talking for a while. You know all the things that I had been doing through him but not from me. I want to talk to you about everything; about my achievements, problems and what I've become lately. You know before that I've been through hell without me telling you a word, but through your powerful instinct. You know exactly what I had been feeling back then. My little angel take care of her, don't make her angry, make her proud. If you won't be able to come back here I will find my way to be there with you guys, I promise. . . I miss you!

I aM nOt aLoNe

Well at least kanina tinanggap yung reaction paper, yung assignment sa Rizal. Nang sa isang girl dyan muntikan na tayo mapagalitan :)) !

Hmm I think I would be able to come and join your outing pero bad trip may kakausapin si dadeh sa isa sa inyo before na pumayag siya na sumama ako. So sana lahat kayo makakapunta at least, errrr ano ako eight year old? hahaha

Bad 3p di matutuloy yung chillax! Lahat kasi may ginagawa eh kung wala naman ginagawa out of town naman, hahahahaha. Bawi na lang next time.

REFLECTION:

You are lucky to have us as your friends. You even had two advisers at your problems with that girl. But what are we if you don't wanna listen? You know, sometimes you are pathetic. You think she will easily fall with your looks and charms? News flash! She is hard to get. If you want to have her I suggest you better start changing! Start on being dilligent and hard working, you lack these kinds of attitudes.

All along I thought that I am alone? But I have someone else who had the same kind of opinion with my group. For now we don't give a damn about you guys! Go ahead, make issues to yourselves and you'll see that it is you had problems not me.

iT gOeS on And on

Wow grabe, its been a while since I've post something. I am obsessed on studying Rizal. I never thought that even he had his own controversy. The retraction paper is just b***s***!

Welcome back Kat!

Partner, kailan tayo mag lelead at ano yung theme natin? Let's talk about it ayt!?

hehehe anyway nuff said. . .

REFLECTION:

Laying down such a rude comment won't stop my posts. Fine I admit my mistakes so stop rubbing it in. Some people like me some people don't. If you have a problem with my posts then don't read it at all!

What have I done wrong? Every time I do something, it seems that I disappoint someone. Whether it is for the best or not, there will always be somebody against me. I cannot please everybody can I?

You are just hallucinating my dear! Are you really on, both of you? Or you are just exaggerating things? You better stop this nonsense and move on.

Well the decision is yours. If you want to move to another group then go, nobody is stopping you. But, hey, don't forget us ayt!

Thanks guys! Thanks for being such a big help, what would I be without you? And, hey, we still have a lot to do but lets not forget to enjoy every moment of it.

No matter how hard I try for you to be mine, I could still see that your heart still belongs to him but what the heck, its fun being single. Loosing her is enough for me, I don't want to loose you now. . .

bLamE tHe biRds. . . (2nd parable)

I thought that going to the church will be setting my problems at school aside, but yet another problem had occured at KOA. This will not go to pass, it will be put to action immediately! I can't believe that our outing was moved, but at least meron pa rin pero matagal nga lang.

I am having a difficult time with my assignment, studying my research work and reviewing for my pre-midterms. But yet I am ready to push my body and brain to the limit!

Grabe may cell na ako pero papaconvert ko pa, hindi kasi dito binili, sana maayos, hehehe ! ! !

Oh to the new members, especially to Iris! WELCOME TO PRYM ! ! !

REFLECTION:

I would prove to you that I have done this! Can't wait to put you on shame. But I have a back up plan to you. I will prove that you've made a big mistake!

If there is a will there is a way! If things are impossible there are many reasons why is it impossible. I am sorry but you are not the person I've been knowing ever since, things had realy changed quite fast. I had my fate on you, but that was before. But I am not saying that I am against you, infact I am just letting it unfold like I usually do.

There were two birds that are locked up on a cage, inside that cage there were able to do what they want and they live happily inside, having the owner giving them food and drink. Until one day an eagle saw them happily together and was interested with them. He also wanted to share his happiness and stories of flying with them. So the eagle went down and tried to open the cage, but it was locked plus the lock's key hole is so rusted that it won't open. As the birds saw the eagle trying to almost destroy the cage by pushing it towards the edge of the plat form, the female bird said: "Don't destroy it! Leave us alone we are happy living our life together! Do not disturb us!"

"But don't you want to be free? Don't you like to explore new things?"

"There's no need for that for we are satisfied here."

"All I wanted to do is to help."

"Leave us now! I don't care about going out the cage for at least we are here living happily together!" So the eagle left the cage. Years had passed, until the cage is all rusted. Until one day the male mocking bird got tired of being in the cage and said to his partner: "Lets get out to this cage! Look, it is too rusty now that we could peck our way out." But the other insisted and wanted to stay. But the male wanted go out and be open to other birds so he left his partner and pecked his way out of the cage. The female mocking bird blamed herself inside the cage. Every birds that she saw passing by she blamed them one by one that they were the reason why she had problems. Until one day she got old and died inside the cage, while the male mocking bird had met many friends and lived happily with them flying from continent to continent.

wRoNg AccUsAtioN ! ! !

Not on the mood, I am put on shame today and I have to do these freakin' assignments!


REFLECTION
I admit my mistakes and I will find a way to repay them. But being an elder doesn't mean you have to abuse it! I don't believe that you are in that proffesion and I don't know how will the patient survive with you. We are not weak and we are not stupid. We don't hear this words from our parent's mouth, who are you to say this words with your sharp tounge. I don't care about your opinions, all I care about is that you treat us right. If you are an educated man like you say you are, you are not suppose to throw things, give us a painful comments and mock our group. Yes, I don't like my group too, but yours is too much; your making it personal. But how could I even give a complaint to a person that's supported very well. But don't worry I have found a way to avenge myself! I won't rebel don't worry I'll do it on the "paper".

aNgeL oF mInE

I'll never know and will never be

If I would be able to go even further

If I could ever touch or ever see

Your ever lasting smile and laughter

Through the fire I try to keep on fighting

Through the distance I try to keep in touch

Through the rough grounds I continue standing

To those falls that are too many much

I see thy face to the falling sunset

I hear your laughter from the cheers of a child

But yet I am still on a big upset

And I long for your love that's so mild

Please come back, and with me please stay

Take away my sadness that's ruining my day

To this to the Lord I turn and pray

I miss you so bad I hope we could play

cAreLesSnEsS

Bad trip! This sucks! This time I lost my phone! And its for real now. . . Grabe talagang pag dating sa CP talagang minamalas ako. Isang taon lang abot ng cellphone sa akin pansin ko. . .

At school, everything was fine! Eversince I've been talking with her I've been quite free na too. It's like I am in full control of everything, well not all hehehe ayoko magging self centered.

We watched Rizal at Paul's house yesterday, grabe ang haba ng movie, the VCD has 3 CDs and the time frame of a CD is 60 minutes. Well at least busog :)) and may "intermission" commercial bwahahahahahaha =)) ! ! !

REFLECTION

Even when the sun rises up to give light to the world, darkness could still come anytime! It could be in a form of a storm, eclipse or whatever mother nature could give. This things could come anytime without warning. And if you are not carefull or prepared it could take away anything even your life.

Though I tried to let them see the reality between the two of us. I feel that there is already a hidden grudge or strugle with in themsleves. Sometimes I feel guilty when they see us talking. But here's the thing, you are one of my trusted friends, you had touched my life and I don't want you to go faraway from me. But still I am still confuse on what to do. . . For now, we should set our priorities first, lets help each other like what we are doing now. Lets not bother on things that is not suppose to be bothered. Its there problem not ours. . . !

bRavE heArT

Grabe, yung mga prof namin kung mag bigay ng quiz. Yung isa nag dedemanda ng mga pangalan may sitting arrangements pa na nalalaman, yung isa naman pagka haba-haba ay nakakaantok mag quiz. But here's the funny part, I failed those two first quizes. Grabe tapos may quiz nanaman kami sa Phil Lit, hindi ako naka review. Grabe, tapos next week mid terms na namin hindi pa nag bibigay ng pointers. Hay naku ang bilis naman! Sabagay 3 subject lang kami eh

Uy! Nakapasa yung isa dyan sa MaDoCs! Naks naman! Buti hindi ka pinag sabihan sa PE, well kung hindi sila mag sasabi ako na lang. Mag pataba ka! >:P hahahahahaha jokes peace tayo.

Sana sumali ka na sa amin! See you there!

REFLECTION

It's not that I am afraid of him, I just don't want to add another thorn at my back. I don't want any trouble too. But I don't want you to get away from me. Too long that we have been apart because of issues and to him. Let's be steady and keep it cool at all times.

You asked for my help and made a decision to yourself. I am not saying that you are against me for I told you that I am just here to help and give advices but the decision is still yours. You followed your brave heart. From here on you've made a decision, you must know what to do. Don't tell me your confused! You can't back down now. . . But if anything goes wrong, be strong! Remember we are here ready to help get up when you fall.

tHiS wAs UneXpEctEd

I never thought that magiging member na ako ng music pool sa school. Hehehe, thanks to you talaga at nagging myembro na ako at least sa isang organization at MDC. Masaya na ako dun, music pool pa! I tried to join the organization nung 1st Sem pero hindi ako nakakaatend ng meetings nila. Again to you I say thank you very much.

Ang saya ng activity namin nung Saturday sa park, hahaha! Although my plan kinda back fired nung sa apple (sayang hindi sila lima). We had fun by playing with the eggs >:). Lagkit noh!? =)) Lansa pa ( iba yung nasa isip ko ata :)) =)) >:P ) Joke lang!

REFLECTION:

Happiness is like an adrenaline, it can be only used or felt for a little while but after that, sorrow and trials come along like a road that leads to a long and hot dessert. But as you finally find your destination along the blazzing heat. Its like laying on the white sands of a beach resort, down under the shade of a pine tree and beside you is an ice cold drink. Enjoying the view of nature, observing and hearing the waves of the beach and cleaning your medal with a wax while currently wearing it like just like a necklace.

sUmtHin

Ei for those two gals gud luck, kaya nyo yan! Sus kami nga ni partner nakayanan yung project eh kayo pa kaya, hehehe and this one is for recreation lang heheheh. Trip trip pero may patutunguhan.

Grabe kanina sa skul, may nasabi ako di maganda sa fellow 1st year student ko na hindi ko ka section. Hindi ko naman sinasadya :((, sorry if you ever heard me. Promise titinu na ako.

I miss Fishelle, yiheee =))

REFLECTION:

Its good to hear that you have moved on! Keep on doing what you have to do, don't let them get into your way. I am with you always, till the end I'll be your guide. All we have to do is to help and trust each other.

Why do you keep on looking back to the things that are suppose to be on the trunk? Don't you know that all the story had been already ripped from the page and nailed at the bulletin board along with the cut up news papers. When will the hammering stop? When will raging bulls have their rest? When will you give a player his break? Is this really what you wanted? To bring nothing but trouble with in the society? Is this the image that you wanted to bring to the fellowship? Nothing but piercing mouths and echos? We came here for a purpose not to bring chaos. We are here to bring light not to blow it off. We are here as teachers not as rebels.

tO tHe cOuRt "A PaRabLe"

Hmmm. . . Having a summer class is not quite bad at all. I mean first of course I earn a allowance and I am able to save at least a hundred a day. Second, good thing the professors are not boring upon disscussing the lessons, although I have to say that our prof at English 2 is new and she has to improve her styles of teaching, I hope they are able to give us even a little pasyensya hehehe.

REFLECTION:

The man who was seated at the jury, saw that the debate and accusations are growing louder and louder that the crowd had also join the controversy. He tried to calm down and reminded himself that the judge is here to keep things in order. But he noticed that the judge can't no longer control the room. "I can't stand this!" the man said to himself and can't no longer control his emotions. So he finally stood up and went to the center of the court. He shouted to all the people in the court, "Be silent! Your blasphemies had even brought confusion to the young!" And the crowd was silenced and listened to him "I am right, am I not? That you don't even know what you've been hearing and saying lately. I think you don't even understand what's going on? How dare you give complaints to the person that's been bringing us this far. If you were at his position what would you feel? What would you feel if you spilled your time and money to your children and all they do is abuse it or rebel in return but infact all you wanted to do is to give them a good and comfortable life. He does this not for himself but to you because he wants us all to be happy in this society which should really be! Isn't this what they are here for? To give concerns to each and everyone of us? To guide us through the trials of life? And what did you do? You miss interpreted everything and made up a story! If I were you, better say nothing if you are not helping at all or yet better do nothing if you are not involve at all. Fine if you know it all, but better keep things to yourself! I understand all of your concerns but think about this, aren't you even aware of your interventions!? EVEN THEE IS INVOLVE BUT THEE STILL LEADS EVERYTHING TO THE PROTAGONISTS! WHAT MORE TO YOU GUYS WHO ARE NOT REALLY INVOLVE AT ALL!"

hAvE it YoUr wAy!

What a way to end my sem break! We had a party yesterday, the celebrants are those PRYM peeps that had already graduated. Wow congrats guys keep on doing it! Mel sigurado ka na sa Narsing mo!? Hehehe your choice. I had a rematch with Kuya G's mix, tied up na kami. Before I was knocked out at Round 10 but yesterday through urinating points (sorry about that, peace).

Aya I don't care kung sintunado ako! Nasa healing stage palang voice ko nun I just wanted to have fun!

REFLECTION:

Who are you to give such rash judgements! Are you even part of the hearing!? Even I who had become part of it had never judge anything between the parties nor taking sides to anyone!

I know the couple went to you and you to each of us, but it doesn't mean that you have been placed at the band. They went to you maybe becuase they either trust you or they have no one to turn to by now. But you have no right to say that you are pissed off! It is not your story nor mine

Remember what I told you before, it has always been your decision. We are here to guide but the final decision will not be ours but yours. The things that we give and said are not for us but for you. Its okay if you won't listen just don't come running or crying to us and saying you have a problem about it!

You had done enough, its time for them to do the work. It's not your problem to shoulder so why carry it? We are here to guide yes but we should not decide. Let it unfold! Don't listen to what they say, remember, its them who has the problem not you! I had been with you together with the other and the damsell for a long time. So who are they to make up such story... They just want to ride on if you ask me!

For me I have lost my way now... I had failed to such an easy thing for some to do... I am a fool, weak, and only good from the start... Its okay if you wont talk to me fine I'll understand I deserve it anyway... I had lost your trust isn't it? Even if you say we are still friends I had put a scar on you already... You might not admit that your angry, disappointed or upset... Or better yet I am just nothing to you now but a guy who can't even commit a simple commitment...

beTweEn thE LinEs

What a holy week! Compared last year, this holy week was the busiest I ever had. Though I am always out and tired it was all worth it, especially when it is all for Him.

At the Youth, we poured out our voices at Palm Sunday, Holy Thursday, Salubong and the Parish Fiesta. Of course hindi mawawala yung mga kainan and libre hehehe. We also had a animation performance nung Catch Fire, that was before Palm Sunday.

At KOA, we have a new start. First ever KOA Councilors, Kevin and me! New officers, Reynald for President and Amon for Vice President. So far the new assigned officers are taking effect. It has been tested on the holy week masses. All of the masses went well according to plan.

As for me, I have to take the rest of the week off, I have classes na next week, b***s***! Well at least take a look at the good side, hehehe. We should take a good look at the "benefits". Hehehe oh well...

REFLECTION:

You still haven’t learned, my dear. After all the things that we’ve been learning together you still haven’t understand some things. Are you not thinking of your “if(s)” just for a second? Or did you even understand our contract to the society? Even though, you’ve seen these things happen to others as well. Though they had different stories they had only one ending.

You had been our guide through life. You helped us in many different ways. You are really a caring person. But in this case, you’ve done enough. We’ve done enough. Let it unfold. This is what I wanted to do; sometimes a person has to experience downfall before learning how to avoid downfall. But again, this concerns not to a single person, not to the other, not to the guide, not the self but to all. Sometimes a little mistake would cause a big impact to others; it would spread like a virus. I don’t want to see all those hard work, time and sacrifices go to waste.

And the man said: "I have been putting my trust on you always, why is it so hard for you to trust in me. All I ever did in life is not all for me alone! I never said that you would understand; why I would let understand to such a close a mind."

KeEpiNg It cOoL

Today we attended the Catch Fire Cathechism porgram of our parish. The two speakers were quite boring, but, I always love to do praise and worship to the Lord. It makes me feel light from my heavy loads and prepared to anything that I will encounter whether good or bad. Galing ng sayaw namin kala nyo, hah! Para kay Lord yun, hehehe. . . .

We had our lunch break sa Veritas. And whoah, it is such a great feeling to once again step at my old alma matter --the fountain of truth and love, knowledge molder of children and youth-- Veritas Parochial School. Konti lang pinagbago ng school but the biggest change that will happen will begin be this coming school year when Ms. Millette, will take charge as the school's principal. WOOOHHHOOOO, 'Mam! You made a difference before. It's now time to let it out again!'

REFLECTION:

Many voices were heard today. Some of the things that should be hidden were unlocked. I just hope whatever they had right now must be kept under there skin.

I am a risk taker but I am not risking it now. For I don't want anythng bad to happen to either you or me. For now lets focus to what's on our own personal lists

I just hope you make the right decision. We need your talent. Why don't we show it to them and use it to serve the Lord.

The throne is already passed to you, the sun has set on me now and has shown brightly to you. I stepped down already a long time ago. Now's time for you to step up and Lead. But yet don't worry I am still here helping you through the service. If I can do it you can also do it.

fLaSh rEuNioN

I have a big schedule ahead both at church and friends hehehe. And what a way to start it by having a reunion with my closest high school friends (Enzo if you’re reading this you missed a lot!). We had a good time chatting, listening to rock music (Paul Gilbert ROCKS pare!!!!) and of course eating Iris’ burrito recipe. We should have a drinking session but please. . . . Its like 2pm in the afternoon and its hot. I am really happy to see those guys again just like in the old days. Even for a while, it made me felt as if I am high school again. It is good to be back, even though just for 5hrs and 30mins.


Reflection:
It is such an honor to be with you again guys. Although we are not really complete I am more than happy to have a good time with you. There will be a certain point that you’ve got to tell the truth, even though I am one of he’s closest friends, I still have some things to know about him. But whatever will be his action it is better to tell him early rather to see your skeleton in the closet.

Please try to understand my failures and upsets. . . I am just a human being so I am sorry if I didn’t do something that leaded you to such an upset and disappointments. It’s just that I just had a good time and you always screw it up at the end of the day. You do really are a great epal! But yet I have to understand and let out my anger in a different way.

InTo thE LiGhT !

At last its all over... I am done with my finals!!! Wooohhhh!!! But the test at Philosophy was really difficult, It's really a brain wash when answering those questions. Considering that the test was instructed to have no erasures. So I have to skip those question that I am not sure and answer them after I am done answering the questions that I am sure. ANG SUNGIT NG PROCTOR NAMIN ERR SARAP BATUHIN NG BOTE!

The Kerigma 5 concert was fine, we had a good time! But there is still somethings that were lacking at the event. I was expecting a praise and worship will happen. But at least I enjoyed the event with my Youth Ministry and with some friends. I can't believe that Iris and Abigale were there. I was surprised! Hehehe

REFLECTION

You are still confuse my friend! I know you still want her, no doubt about it. If you don't love her anymore you should have not been mourning about her when she was with me. I am innocent! I have nothing to do with anything, okay! I just want to have a good time. And its been a while since we had been talking. Remember, I treat her as a friend or sister. Its not me who has the problem, but you. . .

My friend/brother, thanks for those words of advice and wisdom. But remember something, I am different from you. Like what you also said, you are unique and I am unique too. We somethings in common and differences. I'll make sure that everything will be just fine when you take your leave for a while. I understand you need a rest. I will do my job from here make sure that you'll make yours.

aNd So iT hAd BeEn sAiD

Finally all of my clearances are now complete! All I've got to do tomorrow is to sign it to our adviser. This time I came prepared with my Theology and Anatomy exam unlike yesterday's exam at Filipino and Chemistry. So tomorrow will be the real thing for me. I must get at least a 90% mark at my final exam at Philosophy. This subject has been a pain in the a** this midterm, like the Logic subject at my 1st semester, and I am hoping to make it up to this subject.

PRYMers!!! I hope you got my email!!! Kerigma 5 tomorrow woooohhhooooo!!!! But first things first, I have to take my last two exams (English and Philosophy) and my completion of my clearance.

REFLECTION:

You made the right decision of coming back, you showed us finally that you are a man. You finally saw what caused your downfall. But remember this, you had left a mark to us by yourself. The next time you would repeat that mistake it'll be unforgiven.

I had nothing to say, if you don't want to talk about it that's fine with me. Just don't go raging, bragging and crying in front of either me or her. She has made her decision, I just hope you made yours too. I am sorry if I ever meddled or got involved into your struggle. I am just here to help both of you. I am just showing my concerns as a friend. I know you had something to say to me. But whatever it is whether it is for peace or a debate, you should have let it out instead. I'd rather take the knife stabbed at my heart than at my spine. I'd rather have a talk with a beast than a man on an iron mask.

JuSt a LiTtlE bIT MoRe! ! !

HAHAHA Konting tiis na lang! Mag babakasyon na and mag hoholy week na din. Kahit may pasok ako dis summer okay lang! May 3 weeks vacation naman kami! Ok na yun kesa sa wala! Pero grabe ah ang hirap ng finals namin ngayon! Nakaka siff neck, nakaka sakit ng ulo, nakaka hilo at nakakatanga. Kulang na lang eh mag nose bleed!

Anyways, I got to review! Im done with my at Filipino and Chem (ang hirap!). Tom will be Anatomy and Theo (my favorites) and lastly on Friday, English (sus kailangan pa ba mag aral dyan) and at Philosophy (At least I must get the final exam a 90% total score, dali noh!?). And I have loads of things to do starting on Friday! Hahaha!

Reflection:

I never thought I would be ending this by finding a needle on a hay stack. But whatever happens to me at the future, I will hold my head up high for a job well done and I will face whatever consequences for my errors and mistakes and learn from it!

I am right, am I not? He is still confuse of his decision. You know what? You both had a good experience with each other. At least end it not with an envy, conflict or dillemas. But by thanking each other for the time and experience. I just hope that you both had some things lerned upon being together.

I just hope that you would just hear me out and listen to what I've got to share tom or the day after. You've pushed me off my track, but now its my turn to let out my voice and be heard!

hEaLiNg HaNds

Wooh at last I was able to retrieve my cellphone! Akala ko talagang mawawala na yun. May mga nangyari pang ekek and echopuwera before malaman ko na ang cellphone ko was on the car all along! Wooh! That kinda put away some weight of my shoulders; both me and my dad.

I missed two meetings today, one at PRYM and one at KOA. I have to review for my upcoming finals. This would be quite difficult, kailangan ko mag habol sa Philosophy and Chemistry. Buti pa yung Anatomy ko at least medyo okay na. I realized na when it comes to memorization mas madali for me ang Anatomy hehehe lalo na when it comes to Reproductive System =)) and dali!

My hell week is over but both my clearance and finals week will be the next thing starting tomorrow til Friday. . . Grabe I need to buy an organizer na I have plenty of schedules that I can't keep tract. Hehe got to review na

Reflection

You have been truly been caring, understanding and my superhero! Despite the lies, curses and vulgar things that I have been saying to you on your back. I thank you for all of the generosity that you have shown me. You have proven to me that you will really sacrifice a lot just to give me both the thing I want and need. As the sun shown up this day, I never thought that we would now be this close than ever before. I am sorry if I have not been true to you before, for I thought you just wanted to meddle with my personal life. For I thought your just doing things just for yourself; but all along its for the better good of me and my future as well. I hope that we would soon be able to further reach out to each other. This is just the beginning!

AftEr EvrYthInG HaS cHanGed

Grabe bad trip nawala nanaman cellphone ko errr that's my fourth phone na! Talagang hindi ako pwede mag Nursing! Baka pag naiwan ko yung patient for a while eh mamatay na, grrr!!! Pansin ko lang I've lost three cellphones this school year =((

Speaking of Nursing, I am thinking of shitfting my course to Psychology. I found out that I want to help people and reach out to them by talking and giving advices (like Dr. Phil). And I really love Psychology sa totoo lang. But I have to think this through, hard.

I had an exhausting day to today plus I have to study for my special test at Chemistry on Tuesday. PRYMers, sorry I can't attend the choir meeting tom hehehe bawi nalang me next week.

Reflection:

There are some things that are better yet to be thrown away or left behind. And so you did and so did I. If only I could turn back time I'd rather waste it with you than with someone else. And from there I could show you my real me. But, whatever happened to me has already been done and nailed shut. Slowly everything will soon come to a conclusion and I think everything will be too late now. I am was forced to be silent in our environment. My true me never showed up but through the experience being through that environment I've learned a lot of things the hard way. But no matter what happens, I will keep on survivng this world of pain, this mountain of sorrow, this valley of sadness, this city of injustice and the land of mourning. And with this pain that I am willing to embrace, it would sharpen me to live and survive and soon I would find my way to the road of glory and a new beginning. . .